I Can’t Stop Thinking About: King Clarence’s Japanese Milk Bread. 

Detected Manipulations & Suggested Changes

Appeal to emotion

Using emotionally charged language to persuade rather than providing balanced, descriptive information.

Examples: - "If carbs are the devil, call me a devil worshipper." - "my latest siren song sounded" - "I was enchanted." - "It’s harmonious, I’m converted." - "sending me to nirvana." - "The dish is meant to be shared – but rules don’t apply for fanatics like me." These phrases are designed to evoke strong feelings of desire, indulgence, and devotion rather than neutrally describing the dish.

4 suggestions

Replace highly emotional metaphors with more neutral sensory descriptions. For example: "If carbs are the devil, call me a devil worshipper" → "I really enjoy carb-heavy dishes, even when I try to cut back."

"I was enchanted" → "I was very curious to try it."

"sending me to nirvana" → "It was one of the most satisfying bread dishes I’ve had recently."

Clarify that statements are subjective by adding qualifiers like "to me", "in my experience", or "I found" to distinguish opinion from implied universal truth.

Sensationalism

Exaggerating or dramatizing aspects of the subject to create excitement or shock.

Examples: - "If carbs are the devil, call me a devil worshipper." - "our bakeries have queues for days" - "Six glistening bronze-hued puffs surrounding an Angus bone like an altar" - "It’s arguably as fun as cracking a crème brûlée." - "sending me to nirvana." - "there’s no way I’m sharing this." - "Give it time, and King Clarence will be just as known for its milk bread as its signature fish finger bao." These statements heighten drama and excitement beyond straightforward description, making the dish seem almost transcendent or cult-like.

3 suggestions

Tone down metaphors that imply extreme or supernatural experiences. For example: "sending me to nirvana" → "extremely satisfying".

Qualify broad claims: "our bakeries have queues for days" → "many popular bakeries in Sydney often have long queues, especially on weekends."

Rephrase predictions as personal speculation: "My prediction? Give it time, and King Clarence will be just as known for its milk bread..." → "In my view, this milk bread could become as well-known as its signature fish finger bao if it stays on the menu."

Unsubstantiated claims

Presenting claims without evidence or clear sourcing.

Examples: - "Sydney has carb zealots just as rapt as I am – our bakeries have queues for days, and new ones come quick and fast." (No data or examples given; presented as a general fact.) - "Almost every table ordered it tonight," Nguyen tells me after its dinner-service debut. "I think there might be a limit if it gets any more crazy." (Single anecdotal quote used to imply overwhelming popularity.) - "Give it time, and King Clarence will be just as known for its milk bread as its signature fish finger bao." (A strong prediction stated without any supporting evidence.)

3 suggestions

Add context or data where possible: specify a particular bakery or time period, or note that this is based on observation rather than hard numbers.

Clarify anecdotal nature: "According to Nguyen, on its debut night it seemed that almost every table ordered it."

Frame predictions explicitly as opinion: "I suspect" or "I wouldn’t be surprised if" instead of stating them as near-certainties.

Oversimplification

Reducing complex realities to overly simple or absolute statements.

Examples: - "If carbs are the devil, call me a devil worshipper." (Frames carbs in a simplistic good/evil dichotomy.) - "The dish is meant to be shared – but rules don’t apply for fanatics like me. After having a taste, there’s no way I’m sharing this." (Implied that the dish is so good that sharing is irrational, ignoring differing tastes or dietary needs.) - "Every ingredient is carefully considered – balancing a sweet, texturally snappy and meaty bite with a slight tang, lighting up the receptors on my tongue, sending me to nirvana." (Presents the balance as perfect and universally appealing.)

3 suggestions

Acknowledge nuance: note that some people avoid carbs for health or preference reasons without framing it as a moral or absolute issue.

Clarify subjectivity: "For me, every ingredient feels carefully considered..." instead of implying universal perfection.

Avoid absolute language like "no way" and instead say "I didn’t want to share mine" to keep it clearly personal.

Biased language

Using strongly positive or negative wording that signals clear preference without balance.

Examples: - "almighty grain", "carb zealots", "siren song", "I was enchanted", "It’s harmonious, I’m converted." - "It’s a bread course not lacking a lick of decadence." - "a full team effort" (implicitly laudatory without any critical note). The language consistently elevates the dish and the restaurant, with no neutral or critical counterpoints.

3 suggestions

Balance highly positive descriptors with more neutral, factual details (e.g., price, portion size, potential downsides like richness or heaviness).

Use more descriptive, less evaluative adjectives: instead of "decadence", describe richness, fat content, or sweetness.

Explicitly mark value judgments as personal: "I found it to be a decadent bread course" rather than stating it as fact.

Hasty generalization

Drawing broad conclusions from limited or anecdotal evidence.

Examples: - "Sydney has carb zealots just as rapt as I am – our bakeries have queues for days, and new ones come quick and fast." (Generalizes from personal observation to the whole city.) - "Almost every table ordered it tonight" used to imply widespread, ongoing popularity based on a single service. - "Give it time, and King Clarence will be just as known for its milk bread as its signature fish finger bao." (Strong conclusion from a very early stage of the dish’s life.)

3 suggestions

Limit claims to the scope of the evidence: "From what I’ve seen, many Sydney diners seem enthusiastic about carb-heavy dishes."

Clarify that "almost every table" refers to one specific night and may not represent long-term trends.

Present predictions as speculation: "If the initial response continues, the milk bread could become as well-known as the fish finger bao."

Confirmation bias / narrative fallacy

Selecting and arranging details to fit a pre-decided narrative (here: the dish is extraordinary and transformative).

The article frames the experience as a kind of conversion story: - Opening with "If carbs are the devil, call me a devil worshipper" and "carb zealots" sets up a narrative of irresistible temptation. - "My latest siren song sounded" and "I was enchanted" build a story of being called and converted. - "It’s harmonious, I’m converted" and "sending me to nirvana" complete the arc of transformation. No mention is made of any potential negatives (too rich, too sweet, price, accessibility, dietary restrictions), which would complicate the narrative.

3 suggestions

Acknowledge possible downsides or limitations (e.g., "It’s very rich, so it may not appeal to those who prefer lighter starters" or mention price and portion size).

Include at least a brief note that others might have different tastes or reactions.

Reduce the conversion-story framing and focus more on concrete sensory details and context (texture, flavor balance, portion, cost, availability).